Post by Deleted on May 19, 2013 14:25:02 GMT -6
TONIGHT
FUCK YEAH RYBACK!
WILL BE TAKING ON
JOHN CENA
IN A LAST MAN STANDING MATCH. BECAUSE JOHN CENA VS. GIGANTIC MANBEAST IN AN LMS MATCH IS FRESH AND UNIQUE. PLUS, YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHERE THIS MATCH IS GOING. IS CENA INJURED, OR WAS IT A WORK? WILL WE REALLY PUT THE BELT ON RYBACK AS AN UNDERWHELMING HEEL AFTER I SHOVED HIM DOWN YOUR THROATS AS AN OVERBEARING GREEN BABYFACE? TUNE IN FOR THE CONTROVERSY, STAY FOR WHAT WILL UNDOUBTEDLY BE A GREAT WRESTLING MAHAHAHAHAHAHA, HO HO HO HO I CAN'T EVEN FINISH THAT SENTENCE! LOL SUCKERS!
AS IF ANYTHING ELSE ON THIS SHOW EVEN MATTERS.
OH WAIT THAT'S RIGHT...
MY SON-IN-LAW
IS GOING TO LOSE TO BROCK LESNAR BECAUSE SERIOUSLY, I CAN'T AFFORD TO HAVE LESNAR LOSE AGAIN. EVER. AS IN DUDE'S GONNA BEAT TAKER AT MANIA NEXT YEAR. I DON'T THINK YOU REALIZE, HE MAKES MORE MONEY IN HIS NEW CONTRACT THAN MY WIFE SPENT ON BOTH SENATE RUNS COMBINED. I HAVE TO KEEP HIM HAPPY OR HE CAN ENGINEER A HOSTILE TAKEOVER OF THE COMPANY. YEAH, I KNOW, DUMB CONTRACT. SHUT UP AND CHEER MY SON-IN-LAW. OH, AND...
BELIEVE IN THE SHIELD
BEING PINNED BY KOFI AND KANE TONIGHT CUZ SERIOUSLY THEY'RE ALL JOBBERS.
JACK SWAGGER
WHAT DID YOU THINK I'D GIVE THE HEADLINE TO AL-BORE-O DEL YAWN-O?
YEAH, I KNOW SPANISH.
SERIOUSLY, FUCK YOU ZIGGLER. I ALWAYS HATED YOU AND NOW THAT I FINALLY PUT THE BELT ON YOU (WHICH I ONLY DID BECAUSE I HAVE A RAGING JACKHAMMER FOR AJ), YOU PUT YOURSELF DIRECTLY IN THE PATH OF SWAGGER'S FOOT. DUMBASS. I SWEAR TO ME, THE DAY YOU'RE CLEARED I'M PUTTING THE BELT ON...
SHEAMUS
WHO WILL BEAT MARK HENRY TONIGHT AND IT WILL BE DONE IN A SILLY AND COMEDIC WAY BECAUSE THAT'S HOW YOU GET TWO MONSTER FIGHT-OR-DIE TOUGH GUYS OVER. VARIETY, BITCHES! NOBODY WANTS TO SEE THESE TWO FIGHT ANYWAY, ACCORDING TO TWITTER, SO WE'LL MAKE A STRAP MATCH LESS ABOUT FIGHTING AND MORE ABOUT CHUCKLES.
FAWN
DAWN
GO
WILL HAVE NEW MUSIC AND LESS TALKING AND HIS DANCER IS GONNA BE VICKIE GUERRERO. FUCK YOU, SMARKS. YOU BOO WHO I TELL YOU TO BOO, DAMMIT! NO SINGING! NO IT ISN'T GOOD FOR HIM HE'S A JOBBER WHO I GAVE A STUPID GIMMICK AND YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO HATE ALL OVER IT! YOU'RE ALL FIRED! FIRED, I TELL YOU! LA LA LA I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF THE "CROWD NOISE" BUTTON
ALL THIS AND MORE
8PM ET/5PM PT
on
PAY PER VIEW
GIVE ME YOUR FUCKING MONEY
FUCK YEAH RYBACK!
WILL BE TAKING ON
JOHN CENA
IN A LAST MAN STANDING MATCH. BECAUSE JOHN CENA VS. GIGANTIC MANBEAST IN AN LMS MATCH IS FRESH AND UNIQUE. PLUS, YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHERE THIS MATCH IS GOING. IS CENA INJURED, OR WAS IT A WORK? WILL WE REALLY PUT THE BELT ON RYBACK AS AN UNDERWHELMING HEEL AFTER I SHOVED HIM DOWN YOUR THROATS AS AN OVERBEARING GREEN BABYFACE? TUNE IN FOR THE CONTROVERSY, STAY FOR WHAT WILL UNDOUBTEDLY BE A GREAT WRESTLING MAHAHAHAHAHAHA, HO HO HO HO I CAN'T EVEN FINISH THAT SENTENCE! LOL SUCKERS!
AS IF ANYTHING ELSE ON THIS SHOW EVEN MATTERS.
OH WAIT THAT'S RIGHT...
MY SON-IN-LAW
IS GOING TO LOSE TO BROCK LESNAR BECAUSE SERIOUSLY, I CAN'T AFFORD TO HAVE LESNAR LOSE AGAIN. EVER. AS IN DUDE'S GONNA BEAT TAKER AT MANIA NEXT YEAR. I DON'T THINK YOU REALIZE, HE MAKES MORE MONEY IN HIS NEW CONTRACT THAN MY WIFE SPENT ON BOTH SENATE RUNS COMBINED. I HAVE TO KEEP HIM HAPPY OR HE CAN ENGINEER A HOSTILE TAKEOVER OF THE COMPANY. YEAH, I KNOW, DUMB CONTRACT. SHUT UP AND CHEER MY SON-IN-LAW. OH, AND...
BELIEVE IN THE SHIELD
BEING PINNED BY KOFI AND KANE TONIGHT CUZ SERIOUSLY THEY'RE ALL JOBBERS.
JACK SWAGGER
WHAT DID YOU THINK I'D GIVE THE HEADLINE TO AL-BORE-O DEL YAWN-O?
YEAH, I KNOW SPANISH.
SERIOUSLY, FUCK YOU ZIGGLER. I ALWAYS HATED YOU AND NOW THAT I FINALLY PUT THE BELT ON YOU (WHICH I ONLY DID BECAUSE I HAVE A RAGING JACKHAMMER FOR AJ), YOU PUT YOURSELF DIRECTLY IN THE PATH OF SWAGGER'S FOOT. DUMBASS. I SWEAR TO ME, THE DAY YOU'RE CLEARED I'M PUTTING THE BELT ON...
SHEAMUS
WHO WILL BEAT MARK HENRY TONIGHT AND IT WILL BE DONE IN A SILLY AND COMEDIC WAY BECAUSE THAT'S HOW YOU GET TWO MONSTER FIGHT-OR-DIE TOUGH GUYS OVER. VARIETY, BITCHES! NOBODY WANTS TO SEE THESE TWO FIGHT ANYWAY, ACCORDING TO TWITTER, SO WE'LL MAKE A STRAP MATCH LESS ABOUT FIGHTING AND MORE ABOUT CHUCKLES.
FAWN
DAWN
GO
WILL HAVE NEW MUSIC AND LESS TALKING AND HIS DANCER IS GONNA BE VICKIE GUERRERO. FUCK YOU, SMARKS. YOU BOO WHO I TELL YOU TO BOO, DAMMIT! NO SINGING! NO IT ISN'T GOOD FOR HIM HE'S A JOBBER WHO I GAVE A STUPID GIMMICK AND YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO HATE ALL OVER IT! YOU'RE ALL FIRED! FIRED, I TELL YOU! LA LA LA I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF THE "CROWD NOISE" BUTTON
ALL THIS AND MORE
8PM ET/5PM PT
on
PAY PER VIEW
GIVE ME YOUR FUCKING MONEY